Greeks Want NBA Gyros

Here’s a joke…

Two Greek guys walk into a bar and say: “We want to buy your NBA players.”

The bartender says: “You’re gonna need a lot of money.”

The two Greek guys say: “Don’t worry. We’re good for it.”

The bartender says: “You sure? These fellas are Negros.”

The two Greek guys say: “Yes. Especially if they’re Negros, with Afro haircuts.”

The bartender says: “Alright. But no discount for Afros.”


There’s been something said lately about the possibility of other premier NBA players taking big money from foreign teams and leaving the United States for lucrative contracts with club teams in places like Greece and Italy.

Guys like Kobe, LeBron and Shaq have all been quoted, within the last couple of months, about how much they appreciate what Josh Childress did in signing with Olympiacos, one of the top teams in Euroleague, Europe’s pro basketball league. They all think Childress made a smart, calculated move. They all wish they did it first.

But what Childress did says a lot more about his skill-set and who he is a basketball player than the temptation of playing overseas. Childress is a tweener. That is, too big to keep up with smaller guards but too small to be effective against the bigs. And he was NEVER gonna be the man in the NBA, just too many dudes. This probably ate at him after his All-American career at Stanford, were he played in a couple of Final Fours and was the man.

He is a terrific jump-shooter — it’s his shot which earned him a job an off-guard in the NBA — and he’s smart. Did I mention he played at STANFORD. He realized he could make just as much money and live like a rock star, but he had to do it somewhere other than here. So he accepted an offer from the Old World. Like Mt. Olympus old. He went Greecian 5. Childress is now working for a couple of young Greek hotshots willing to pay him handsomely for his services, and that retro Afro.

The Angelopoulos brothers (Panayiotis and George, third photo from bottom of page) are heirs to a billion-dollar shipping and steel fortune and picked up Olympiacos, Greek’s most successful sports academy, as a play thing. Thing is, they’re serious about making the basketball club the most visable in Europe and have an infinite amount of cash at their disposal.

There’s one problem. They look like a couple of wannabe thugs. These two are shipping magnates? Maybe after they finish potty training. Or have their first shave.

Word is, they practically own Greece. They’re their countries most eligible bachelors, and not because of their Mediterranean good looks. They’ve been seen at Greecian discos with several of the world’s most beautiful models, so you know they’re on the prowl.

Who knows? They could end up attracting your team’s second or third best player.


1 Comment

Filed under Basketball, NBA

One response to “Greeks Want NBA Gyros

  1. Tony

    I think you’ve got the right idea. The big name guys don’t really want to play basketball for Barcelona Buttpirates. They just want to pretend they do to get more money at contract time. It’s just leverage.

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